Music That Moves: Let Me Feel You Shine

This song literally had me jumping out of my chair to dance about 5 mins ago….my new battle song for when I’m in the low place and I don’t know what to say to God….”If I could feel you shine your perpetual night, then maybe I could crawl out of this tonight….” YES YES YES!

This place is trying to break my belief 
But my faith is bigger than all I can see 
What I need is redemption 
What I need is for You for to put me back on my feet 

Wha ah ooooh ooooh oooh 
Wha ah ooooh ooooh ooh oh 

I swear I’m trying to give everything 
But I feel I’m falling, oh make me believe 
What I need is resurrection 
What I need is for You to put me back on my feet 

Wha ah ooooh ooooh oooh 
Wha ah ooooh ooooh ooh ohhh 

If I could feel You shine Your perpetual light 
Then maybe I could crawl out of this tonight 
If I could feel You feel You shine 
Oh let me feel yYou shine 
So beautiful and warm 
So beautiful and bright 
Like a sun comin’ out of a rainy sky 
Oh let me feel You shine Oh, 
Let me feel You shine 

I lift the knife to the thing I love most 
Praying You’ll come so I can have both 
What I need is for You to touch me 
What I need is for You to be the thing that I need 

Wha ah ooooh ooooh oooh 
Wha ah ooooh ooooh ooh ohhh 

If I could feel You shine your perpetual light 
Then maybe I could crawl out of this tonight 
If I could feel You feel You shine 
Oh let me feel You shine 
So beautiful and warm 
So beautiful and bright 
Like a sun comin’ out of a rainy sky 
Oh let me feel You shine 
God I need a Savior 
O come Generous King 
O God I need a Savior 
To come rescue me 

Oh let me feel You shine Your magnificent light 
Then maybe I could crawl out of this tonight 
If You let me feel You feel You shine 
Oh let me feel You shine 
So beautiful and warm 
So beautiful and bright 
Like a sun comin’ out of a rainy sky 
Oh let me feel You shine 

Let me feel You shine 
Let me feel You shine

Tis the Season…For Love & Light to Win

Confession: I was supposed to write this post yesterday, but I got caught up in

  • Wrapping gifts I didn’t buy until Thursday
  • Sleeping
  • making HOMEMADE PopTarts for the-boys-who-won’t-eat-anything.
  • Sleeping
  • Wiping yards of snot from Alex’s nose
  • Cleaning
  • Trying to keep my emotions in check
  • Having theological debates on FB with legalists who claimed my heart ain’t in the right place if my behind isn’t in CHURCH on Christmas morning.
  • Having a dance/rock & roll/headbanging party complete with air guitar and fist pumping

It was a busy day, but the best one I’ve had since Monday night…when Alex spiked a fever of 103 that stayed til Wednesday WHILE suffering through an ear infection and lung congestion.  I hated this week and the way it made my life just ooze out of me. I’m so tired it feels like I’ve been pummeled with Chuck Norris’ fists.  The stress of it  triggered my BP which led to mood swings and a mental nosedive into a low. We won’t even talk about the side of holiday blues that edged it’s way onto the plate as well. (Me+ Holidays=Depression)

But I will talk about the fact that when  I woke up yesterday, I felt strength I hadn’t felt all week. It pulled me out of bed and helped me face the day…and Christmas.  It helped me quietly shake off the stress of the week and live free. I was able to laugh and enjoy the shenanigans that come with parenthood.  The reality of how different life is this Christmas still lingered, but I was able to avoid it’s gaze and focus on the good stuff….

…like LOVE. That strength I felt when I woke up? It was love. I could feel it emanate from deep in the center of my heart and start to spread itself to every corner, every dark place inside of me. I read somewhere this week that Christmas originated out of a week long festival or celebratory season of light’s victory over darkness. You know, the winter solstice stuff. While I choose to take this time of the year to celebrate the birth of my Savior, I can totally relate to celebrating light’s beating the crap outta darkness. Who wouldn’t? Yesterday that’s what I felt: God’s love for me shining bright and pushing back the darkness I had found myself in all week long.  It enabled me to take care of myself yesterday (on Self-Love Saturday) , something I’d been unable to do all week.

Wherever your source of love & light comes from, I really hope it finds you and fights for you when you need it to this holiday season. The holidays are rough to get through, especially if you’ve lost a loved one, are living with an illness (mental or otherwise), or have a loved one who is. Take heart. Focus on love. Let it triumph over the darkness you’re in. Allow it to lift and support you so you can TAKE CARE OF YOU….which will guarantee you can take care of those in need and those around you.

Spending Christmas single, and with my boys in two different houses definitely isn’t my ideal way to celebrate….but at least I still have love to rejoice over, right? From God, from my children, from my friends and other family members….I still have love.

And that?

Is enough. My prayer is that it’s enough for you as well.

I’ve been playing these two songs since yesterday, and they are definitely two of my favorites….

MERRY CHRISTMAS y’all.

Song of the Day…or Week

He is Jealous For Me….

Despite my shortcomings, the mistakes I make, the things I don’t get right, He loves me. As someone who grew not receiving the love of my father, I find comfort and peace in the fact that God, my heavenly father, embraces me and covers me in His love and mercy. His love overwhelms me this morning…….”We are His portion and He is our prize, drawn to redemption by the the grace in His eyes….oh, how He loves us, oh, how He loves…”

My prayer this morning is that these lyrics and His love pierce your heart as they have done mine, and that you come to know the unrestrained love He has for you.